The 'gaul' of a man who only had to put his hand up (or not get his hand involved in the first place...)

It's the story everyone is talking about at the moment (no, not the Queen's speech, although maybe we can lead the way by introducing a bill encouraging people playing football to not use their hands...). Yes, it's 'Le Hand of God', which completed France's precarious path to qualifying for the 2010 Fifa World Cup, leaving the Irish pushed to one side, sitting on their backsides, with nothing but the knowledge that deserved to win on the night to be their comfort. In all likelihood they'd probably had rather have lost 1-0 than going out in such excruciating circumstances.

Some may say that my title doesn't do Monsieur Henry justice - he did indeed own up, even to the players whilst he was still on the pitch, but, to be honest, he might have well have kept quiet - what help is it admitting it then? At least if you're going to admit it express some kind of remorse. At the very least admit what you did was wrong and against the law and the spirit of the game, let alone good human nature. I can't believe Richard Dunne bought the cop out of it being down to the referee - the referee couldn't see, Thierry could see (not to mention feel) it. The job of the referee is to help enforce the laws of the game. He doesn't go around whispering in the ears of players to tell them not to foul people, not to use your hands or not punch someone in the face. There's some level of co-operation that needs to go on, where that natural inclination is for every player to stick to the rules and admit when they've slipped up if it's needed.

I think the whole episode says a lot about society. One, those backing Henry seem to have this mentality of 'you get as much as you can with as little as possible input', and these people seem to assume that everyone else wishes to behave in this way too. Fortunately, this isn't true. Being a proper man (or woman), is about having integrity, rooted in a sense of right and wrong, and striving to see a better world for all. Take away integrity and you become a liar who swings one way or the other at the drop of a hat, lose a sense of right and wrong and your decisions are of no merit, and without the perspective of a better world you become content with seeing unrealised potential present in the outworking of life. However, and this leads to point two, people do actually seem to see this lack of 'manliness' and get really riled. For something that is essentially just a game, this is remarkable. Whilst this is in no small part due to the overblown nature of football in the modern world, I think it's also due to the high value we intrinsically see in opposing injustice. Irrelevant of whether the Irish 'deserved' to win on the run of play, in that one decision an injustice that saw the most basic of football rules broken and not rectified left the watching public seething. Perhaps this suggests that all is not lost as far as society is concerned - if only we could harness that anger at injustice and direct it towards reducing poverty, climate change and the other more pressing matters of the day - think of the possibilities!

As an aside, someone on the BBC forum suggested this news should have alerted us sooner...!

(Some Biblical advice for Thierry Henry: Micah 6:8)

Skating on thin ice

My friend Steve recently made a post about faith, and this reminded me of an illustration I heard a while ago.

Imagine two people, out in the middle of winter, who come to two different lakes, both of which have frozen over. One is apprehensive, and edges out, slowly, but surely, steadying themselves, and forever aware of the ice, ready to get off if it starts to crack. The other is care-free, sprinting out to the middle of the lake, jumping, rolling, and having a great time, with no thought for the potentially-fragile ice sheet below him. Unfortunately for the second guy, the ice is very thin, and begins to crack. Fearless, and trusting that the ice would hold his weight, he is now in extreme danger and the ice soon gives way, and the man is left stranded, without a hope. Meanwhile the other guy, after a while, becomes more confident. As he tests the ice out, he learns that it is solid, that it holds his weight, and knowing this, he trusts it will hold. He runs, he jumps, he skates and dances and does whatever comes to mind, trusting, with good reason, that the ice beneath his feet is solid and won't let him down.

Hopefully you see the parallel, but it's important to say that everyone has their faith in something, whether it be money, a house, a job, family, friends, whatever, and in many circumstances and to varying degrees, this is a good thing - we need to trust to live in community and to plan for the future. But they will all fail at some point, none of them are perfect. We can't even put complete faith in ourselves, as one day we will die and our bodies betray us. For the people whose faith is built on that and nothing less, they will be left exposed when all is said and done. But I believe that God is solid, will bear us up, and is worthy to be trusted.

But this is the other important point. The main thing isn't how strong your faith is. It can be really weak, you can be crawling, on your knees, but if you put your faith in the right thing, then that is what matters. As our faith grows and we learn to trust more, we can move with more freedom, enjoy it more, and learn, receive and give much more, living life to the full, as it was intended to be.

So first and foremost, it's far more important what your faith is in than how strong your faith is, but secondly, once we've found something we can trust in forevermore, we should seek to have a deeper faith, to grow, and to be safe in the knowledge of eternity assured, forever, in paradise.

Someone with something interesting to say

After the Revelators gig (and hence why I got back so late) I chatted with a guy, Antun, who really had passion as he spoke, something really invigorating. He started off chatting to Marstin, telling him how distinct his sound was, how he should be pushing forward and trying to get on to bigger things, convinced of his talent. I carried on talking to Antun once Marstin had gone, and as we chatted, it became one of those conversations I wished I could record as he would reveal interesting insights one after another. He's a Croatian Chemistry PhD student, but his intelligence and interests expanded beyond this. With Marstin having pointed to God in their conversation as his source of musical uniqueness (his 'fingerprint', as Antun put it), faith was then brought up in our conversation too. We spoke at length about faith and religion, and whilst I got the impression he wasn't a Christian, and that he'd got the wrong (but understandable) picture about Christianity, some of the things he said really got me thinking.

He spoke of how you might be driving along following the GPS and knowing where you are supposed to go, following the directions you are told. But then sometimes you have to stop and think, "Is this right? Is this where I want to go?". Sometimes you have to question. Perhaps we go through life following the pattern of this world, doing what is expected of us and never thinking we might 'swim against the stream' (as Marstin might say!). Then we have to reconsider, is this where I want to be going, is it getting me where I really want to be, do I even know where I want to be, and how would I get there?

He spoke to about how many people try to be like God, and how this is what Christianity is about. I thought this sounded like trying to earn your way into heaven, and so was keen to refute this, but as I thought about it, it struck me that, yes, I do want to be like God, to be like Christ. He's my example, the one person we should measure ourselves against, as much as we'll never measure up. He elaborated, saying how we're all going at different angles, some going directly down, far from God towards the evil one, others apathetic and just going along flat. Others still go at a slight angle, trying lamely to get to God, whilst others try harder and harder still, until, perhaps, one day we're going straight up, to be just like Him. Of course, we'll never achieve that, but I want to keep trying.

Finally, he spoke about how when comparing Islam and Christianity, he felt that one was about finding power, whilst the other about finding hope. Whilst I won't comment on Islam, it struck me that he had hit the nail on the head with Christianity. You see often we struggle through life, trying to find some new way of getting by, but everything falters and our hopes are left dashed. Christ however offers us that true, everlasting hope, that we can and will be saved, if we just put our faith in Him. I'm so thankful that I can know for certain that "my hope is built on nothing less than Jesus' blood and righteousness" - and what a solid foundation that is.

Messages at Christmas Time

I figured I'd check out what our head of state had to say on Christmas Day and it was all quite nice, but maybe too nice. In this year's message, a more sombre mood was conveyed, to be expected given the credit crunch and all has come with it. She spoke of how through the years those that have been happiest are those "who have lived the most outgoing and unselfish lives; the kind of people who are generous with their talents or their time". The speech meanders on a bit, lots of things that perhaps you'd expect, and then she 'drops the J-bomb', as my housemate Al has so beautifully put it in the past:

"I hope that, like me, you will be comforted by the example of Jesus of Nazareth who, often in circumstances of great adversity, managed to live an outgoing, unselfish and sacrificial life. Countless millions of people around the world continue to celebrate his birthday at Christmas, inspired by his teaching."

I can't help but think it all sounds a bit 'PC'. Hopefully she mentions Him because she wants to, because she follows Him and trusts in Him. But there must be some rule or some person that is saying "No, you'll sound a bit weird, so tone it down. Make him out to be a good teacher or something, but nothing more."

What was very interesting was to see the Alternative Christmas Message, which was shown on Channel 4, controversially delivered by Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, the President of Iran. It was actually quite refreshing to hear how he spoke. To hear a man speak so openly, with conviction, unashamedly, about God, was something that we in Britain can only dream of. Of course there are major concerns about whether he practices what he preaches in this message, and I disagree about who he believes Jesus is, but a lot of what he says I believe to be true. Only when this country, and the rest of the world, turns back to God will it start to see real solutions. There's no promise for our lives to be problem free, but be living in step with God we learn to be dependent on Him, not on our own wealth, to hunger after a deeper sense of meaning, not a larger house, and we'll be fighting to see his Kingdom come to earth, not just defending our own particular 'kingdom'.

But it does remind me of a video I came across last year of the Queen's first ever televised speech, broadcast in 1957. This has been a long post, so I won't comment any more, but I'll leave you with an almost prophetic quote from her speech:

"That it is possible for some of you to see me today is just another example of the speed at which things are changing all around us. Because of these changes I am not surprised that many people feel lost and unable to decide what to hold on to and what to discard. How to take advantage of the new life without losing the best of the old.

But it is not the new inventions which are the difficulty. The trouble is caused by unthinking people who carelessly throw away ageless ideals as if they were old and outworn machinery.

They would have religion thrown aside, morality in personal and public life made meaningless, honesty counted as foolishness and self-interest set up in place of self-restraint.

At this critical moment in our history we will certainly lose the trust and respect of the world if we just abandon those fundamental principles which guided the men and women who built the greatness of this country and Commonwealth.

Today we need a special kind of courage, not the kind needed in battle but a kind which makes us stand up for everything that we know is right, everything that is true and honest. We need the kind of courage that can withstand the subtle corruption of the cynics so that we can show the world that we are not afraid of the future."

The dream is not over

An interesting talk at the CU (Christian Union) meeting last night.

The key phrase from the speaker for me was that "When the President is dead, the dream is over", in reference to figures such as JFK, and also the hysteria being whipped up for Obama - the dreams these candidates can create. His suggestion was that the disciples would have felt this for themselves as Jesus, their Messiah, was crucified and in the days that followed - he was not who he said he was; the dream was over.

I thank God that he is not dead, that the dream is alive, and that the dream is a guaranteed reality.

What are they searching for and what's the answer they need?

I've just found one of the lab applications on Google called Google Trends. On it you can search terms to see how their popularity has changed over time and in different cities.

Having a look at 'God' there appears to be an upward trend in news articles. Also interesting is which countries have the greatest number of searches. The US up there at number 2 isn't a surprise, neither too is Australia at 3, given, amongst over things, the popularity of Christian music in the general charts. More surprising is number 4, India, and even more so the fact the number 1 is the Philippines.

What do these (admitadely limited) results demonstrate? That more and more people are interested in Christianity? That more and more people want to hear about the good news of Jesus Christ? Well a similar search for the term 'Jesus' has slightly different results. There's still an increasing trend, but it's not as pronounced. Similarly whilst Philippines are still there, India has disappeared, whilst the South American nations have made an appearance. Comparing the two makes for interesting viewing too. Peru, for example, doesn't seem to care about God, but in comparison is positively intrigued by Jesus, and a similar result is observed for the South American (predominantly Catholic) nations. Most of the other nations though, whether it be the West or nations such as India, are 'searching for God' but not for 'Jesus'.

Maybe then, whilst God is increasingly on the agenda, along with spirituality more generally, people are not necessarily turning to the Christianity for answers to their questions. Whether it be the (often accurate) negative impression of Christianity presented to many (wagging fingers rather than open arms), whether it be a lack of willingness to admit someone else is right, perhaps a longing to discover something intimate rather than something of empty ritual believing in a distant, aloof God who doesn't bother to show himself, it is clear (not just from these results) that people don't see Christ as an answer to their 'spiritual' questions.

As a Christian, in this age where people are reaching out, my job is to be honest to be open, not to condemn, only to come alongside individuals and love them, pointing to my Saviour and the man, the God I believe to be their Saviour.

Truth or the easy option?

I've just been to the commissioning of some new Salvation Army officers (ministers) and it was a very interesting, inspiring and challenging time, as these things often are.

But whilst these occasions are often a source of inspiration, they can often be a source of frustration too. In the afternoon meeting, in which the ceremony took place, there was a song entitled 'Dear Lord, I do surrender'. Now this is one of those songs that has a sentiment that a lot of other songs express too. "I'm giving up life and following God" the songs will say, and it makes it sound incredibly easy. I often nowadays fall silent during these songs and just try to contemplate what it means, and this happened again when we got to the second verse:

Too long at ease in Zion
I’ve been content to dwell,
While multitudes are dying
And sinking into Hell.
I can no more be careless,
And say there’s naught to do,
The fields are white to harvest
And labourers are few.

How on earth can you not be challenged by that verse? People are on their way to Hell and I'm saying I'm going to respond? That's not something to say lightly. And yet the third verse confirms:

O hear, thou God of Heaven,
The vows that now I make!

So everyone there was making a vow to give their life to God and live for him. But surely no matter what their intentions the song makes no sense. Either they're lying and they're not giving their lives to God, or else, if hundereds of people in the room and millions more who have song are telling the truth, then the 'labourers' really aren't that few.

I suppose what I'm saying is that for our songs to have any meaning, we have to think about what we're singing and be honest in what we proclaim. It's easy to go along with the crowd, but harder to stand there and say "you know what, I don't know if I'm actually ready for this yet". I'm really hoping that the Church will rediscover a deep longing to proclaim truth (even if it means making ourselves look like 'bad Christians') and not just do what's expected. If we're content with anything less than truth, if we're content with not being challenged, 'content to dwell', then we won't be changed, and neither will this world.

Why the name?

Thought it'd be good of me to explain the title of this blog.

The main title essentially describes how I'm trying to work out and uncover what is true in life. Truth is everywhere and it's just waiting to be discovered. I recently read a book called 'Velvet Elvis' by Rob Bell. In it, amongst other things, he speaks of how if he sees truth anywhere he'll claim it for himself. Writing as a Christian, he believes that Christ is the way, the TRUTH and the life, and yet he describes how he can look at, for example, the practices of some groups of Muslims in Turkey (rather than getting a mortgage they build their homes bit by bit to avoid accumulating debt) and claim that 'truth' for himself. God created this world and is in this world, he figures, and so truth isn't limited to just what the Christians say, what Church says, or even what the Bible says, but can be found in the world around us. So this blog is an attempt to seek out truth in the world, and I'd like it if you can join in too, by commenting on my posts.

The sub-title perhaps needs more explanation. Let me say first of all that this isn't an announcement that I have a terminal illness. It's inspired by many thoughts I've had over the last year or so. Firstly, I remember seeing the title of a song by Muse, 'Thoughts of a dying atheist', and wondering how much those thoughts would differ from those of a dying Christian. Would the Christian have more of a sense of hope, or one of confusion, as to why this was happening to them? How would I feel if I was dying?

But this phrase has taken on a whole new meaning to me. Since I became a Christian, in the true sense of the word, (when I was 17/18) I've been learning more and more about who God is, who the man called Christ who walked the earth was, and what God wants for and from me. I've learnt of his love, of his forgiveness, of his mercy, but whilst some seem to say that all you need to do in life is believe, I see in the gospels and in the books that follow that being a Christian was, and is, much more than this. To be a Christian, you have to die. Now for some this has meant physical death as a result of their choice to follow Christ. But for all it means 'dying to the sinful nature' (i.e. stopping doing the things that are not good, are not what God intended), turning around, and living in God's ways. Death was implied by Jesus when he said "If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me", as the cross was what Jesus carried on the way to his execution. So what does it mean to die in this sense? And what does it cost me? The important answer to this comes from Paul, a man claiming to have had a vision of Jesus after his death (one that made Paul blind, and caused a massive humbling and about-turning in his life). In one of the letters Paul wrote to the early Christians, many of which made it into the Bible, he says "For to me, to live is Christ, and to die is gain". But I want a deeper sense of what this 'death' means. Am I dying? Am I dying as I write this? Was I dying this morning but then made a few choices which brought me 'back to life'?

So it is from these thoughts that I start this blog, in the hope that this search for truth by a (sometimes) dying Christian will bring me, and maybe others, something closer to an answer.

Hasn't it all been said already?

Entering my 22nd year, I've been moved to start up one of these things. I've often thought people who maintain these kind of sites must be a bit arrogant, writing their blog for all to see, as though what they say is so important; what can they possibly say that can be so interesting? Well I guess I still believe that to some extent, but over the last few years I have come to one realisation that enables me to transcribe my thoughts here without feeling as though I'm being excessively cocky.

I've come to realise that there doesn't come a point when you are a certified 'life expert', a time when you have made the grade and assume the right to live life making correct choices. I first realised this when I reached 18. For me, when I was growing up 18 looked like the age of enlightenment: your parents had all the necessary experience and knew everything; authors of books, people on TV and all the others expressing their point of view knew all the facts about how things really were; and, well, all the laws and social norms were in place because of their self-evident correctness and completeness. The level of understanding that produced and sustained all this would in turn be obtained by me on my transition into adulthood.

Hitting 18 made me realise that, actually, I was no different from when I was 17, 16, maybe even a growing 10-year-old. Of course things had changed with regards to my levels of maturity and understanding, but essentially I was no more qualified to make perfect decisions than I ever had been. I was quickly learning that things aren't 'black and white'. This isn't to say that I buy into the notion that every opinion is equally valid and whatever anyone says is true ('post-modernism' I believe you call it if you are quite pretentious, or at least something to do with that). I believe truth is there and can be found in any and every situation, but it will most likely be grey.

Anyway, that's my justification for starting this blog, to add my perception on what the true shade of grey in life is. We all have a valuable contribution to make in this search and so, whilst I hope you enjoy my take, maybe you can also chip in with what shade you think it is.